Having kids is tough. At every stage of their life, there’s something they do that drives you crazy.
Whether your infant won’t go to sleep, your toddler won’t stop drawing on the walls, your teenager is ignoring you or your kids are off to college and you miss putting up with their chaos, this list is for you.
Enjoy ten of the best tweets that encapsulate the life of the parent.
My greatest accomplishment as a parent has been convincing my kids that Chuck E. Cheese is only open once a year.
— MotherPlaylist (@MotherPlaylist) April 17, 2018
It’s amazing humans can learn something new everyday. For example, every Tuesday my husband learns our son has soccer practice at 6.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) January 14, 2020
New parent: So you have been a parent for 4 years. Any insight?
Me: It's great. Sometimes you want to escape by faking your own death. But I'm sure it's just a phase.
New parent: Oh, ok. How long does that last?
Me: So far? 4 years.
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) January 15, 2020
Wife: want to have sex?
Me: oh hell yeah.
Toddler: *eye’s snapping open from a dead sleep* not on my watch.
— WTFDAD (@daddydoubts) January 15, 2020
My inbox was full of "This is your VERY LAST chance!" sales right before Xmas, but now here we are many weeks later and they are like "Good news, one more chance!"
Which is pretty much exactly how I discipline my kids.
— Faux Ma (@Faux_Ma) January 16, 2018
Making breakfast for a child:
Step 1: take order.
Step 2: make whatever you want because they're going to hate it & you'll end up eating it.
— Mike Reynolds (@EverydayGirlDad) March 29, 2017
"How many times do cats blink in a day?" and other urgent questions your child HAS to know the answer to at bedtime.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) March 28, 2017
[cleaning pee off my 3yo and…everywhere]
Me: I didn't sign-up for this.
Life: Yes, yes you did. This is exactly what you signed up for.
— Dad's Take (@DadsTake) March 27, 2017
Me: Hey kids it’s never okay to lie!
Also me: tricks kids into thinking they are watching the ball drop at 8 instead of midnight
— Melissa (@Fiveoclockmommy) January 1, 2020
What’s it called when you love your kids but you can’t currently stand them?
— Mama•Is•Dreaming of Coffee (@MomOf2Happas) December 31, 2019
Click here to see more of the best memes and tweets that will make you laugh your a** off!